Killing a Christmas Tradition

Killing a Christmas Tradition 

I think every family has a Christmas tradition of some kind. Many MANY years ago when my husband and I were first married everybody bought for everyone and talk about expensive! Now my family wasn’t the wealthiest by any means but we managed like any other family but Christmas would put a squeeze on all of our budgets so we made a new tradition. Okay it wasn’t a tradition at first it was just an idea. But the idea stuck...for years...hence “tradition”. There was a Christmas that many of us just didn’t have the extra to be buying presents for everyone soooo we decided instead of going broke, let’s go back to the pioneer times and make gifts for each other. But that presented another problem, there were so many of us that it would have taken a year to have made a decent present for everyone. Instead we decided to draw names, that way we only had to make one present. My family being the way we are took it a step further the MAIN rule you had to follow was ZERO money could be spent! ZERO!!! Now technically you didn’t have to make the gift, you could trade if you rather but the golden rule still applied...ZERO money could be spent. 

Some made gifts like a coffee table made from scraps of angle iron. Some used the bartering system and traded an item they had for an item to gift. Some kept items they had won in a raffle earlier that year. It was all fun and some amazing gifts were given. Some were also quite funny, like the year my niece was born. Yes, the children made gifts as well. My niece was less than a month old and had drawn my husbands name to make for. Obviously too young to make or trade we totally expected her to “make” him a dirty diaper but instead he had an actual gift to unwrap. Just a few days previous her umbilical cord had came off and guess who got it? Just recalling the years of gifts and laughter makes me smile as I write this!

But as time went by we began to lose family members and our once large family has turned into what we call a small circle. During Christmas the house would be filled and it would take hours to eat and open presents. Nowadays it’s takes ten minutes, okay maybe some exaggeration there but still you get my point.  Through the years we managed to continue with the tradition as a loved one passed but last year the loss was truly felt. My mom went to be with her Lord and Savior September two years ago. The first Christmas, we managed, as always. But last year I don’t know something changed? I don’t know if it was because it was the first full year without Mom?  Maybe it just became REAL noticeable of just how few of us were left? I honestly don’t know but I could literally FEEL a shift and quite honestly it was a depressing feeling. 

Now I have ALWAYS loved loved loved Christmas! Yes, I am that one that has multiple trees, decorates for Christmas before thanksgiving is over, watching Christmas movies on Halloween, yep I’m that annoying Christmas loving person everyone complains about 🙋🏽‍♀️ So to have my favorite holiday turn into a reminder of all those lost was crushing! I didn’t want another year of disappointment on an amazing holiday so I decided to kill a family tradition. That’s right, just like that, I killed it! I mean why bother with a tradition that doesn’t bring happiness anymore but instead is a HUGE reminder of loss? 

Now with the few of us left, sure we could go back to everybody buying regular presents for everyone but what is the fun in that? I mean my family doing something “normal” YEAH RIGHT! Soooo instead I’ve mixed it up and this year we are going with “something for everyone”. Yes we will buy something for everybody but with a twist. It doesn’t have to be expensive, or cost anything at all, but whatever we buy...we will buy for everyone. Example: one can buy a pair of gloves but they have to buy a pair of gloves for everyone. Seems kinda normal BUT it’s my family so I’m completely expecting someone to buy a large pack of toilet paper and we each get a roll. I did have to put a rule on it...no eggs! I know my family and with us being at 12 I just knew one of them would be buying a dozen eggs. It may not seem like a big deal to whoever may read this but you weren’t at Easter of 1997 when the egg fight happened. What a mess!!! 

My hope is that with all the presents to open it will take longer and maybe bring the laughter back. I don’t pretend we will forget or there won’t be moments of reflection of all those we’ve lost. But I do hope it will remind us to enjoy each other...the ones still here.